Write reviews for leisure. Talks for pleasure

Thursday, 13 November 2014

TOP 5 MALAYSIAN LRT HABITS



This month marks one year of taking the public transport and if you ask me about improvements, I will tell you that there are close to none. The LRT still leaks water from the top cabin and for most of the part the 2 fucking LRT coaches are still functioning (god damn it retire that shit already). The problem with those 2 shitty ass LRT coaches is that they are too small to fit people in there, everytime the coach comes, everyone will be busy fighting or jumping into it and hope that people will make way for them or the door closes first, whichever comes first. Throughout my journey, I have seen lots of different kinds of habits along the way, this is a head's up for tourists who will be visiting Malaysia. It is not because we have bad habits, but we simply just don’t give a fuck when it comes to things like this.

1. The One Who Can’t Be Moved
This is one of the legendary selections, only a few people in the LRT have mastered the art of standing straight up even when the LRT is stopping or moving. They just choose a sweet spot in the LRT and then plant their foot in that particular area. NEVER MOVING AGAIN. It is true because whenever the LRT doors open and people are either entering/exiting they will just stand still there and NOT A SINGLE FUCK WAS GIVEN. Whenever you say "excuse me", they will show you that pissy ass face like you owe them from your previous life. Seriously guys, you all need to know where to fucking stand and move.

2. The One Who Can’t Hear Anything
Basically to identify this bunch of people it is simple. Ride the LRT in the morning, make sure that you don’t wear your earphones/headphones and you will hear a song clearly being blasted as though it is coming from the LRT speakers. That, my friend, are those who could not give a flying fuck to hear the birds chirp in the morning or the sound of metal grinding while the train brings you from Station A to Station Z.

3. The One Who Can't Stand
This particular type of people need to be sitting almost the whole length of their LRT trip. It does not matter if it is just one station or half a station, they must remain seated. The best part comes when there are elderly or pregnant or handicapped people around, they will just remain seated and not a single care was given. I came across an incident personally whereby these two people asked this particular guy to stand and allow an elderly person to sit, and he refused stating "WHY MUST I DO SO?!" Give this guy a medal because his stupidity seems hard to hide.

4. That One Wall
This is dedicated to assholes who stand in front of the LRT door and refuse to budge when people are required to move in/out of the coach. Guys, you are not an invisible pass-able wall, seriously, even with the million EXCUSE ME that we are giving, you all should move along and just either get the fuck out of the LRT so people can exit, or move the fuck in so people can move in. This is by far the worst type of passenger because the LRT doors are automated therefore creating panic when it starts to beep to signal the closing doors and nobody seems to either ENTER or EXIT because of fucking geniuses like this.

5. The One Who Never Took A Bath
Usually this legend you will only find after working hours around 6pm when you take the LRT in a rush. When they step in, you will soon realise people will be closing their noses with handkerchiefs, tissues, their own arms, phones, tablets and also anything that they can cover 2 holes with. The cabin will then slowly be void of people and everyone will slowly move on to another cabin area. Oh the best part is, they will just ignore their body odour and raise their arm to hold onto something and the air conditioning will just blow directly to their armpits and LO AND BEHOLD, IF YOU SMELLLLLLLLLLLL..... All the best, remember to stay alive. 

Regards,
Kevan 
Frequent LRT user. lately.


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